Infertility: Sometimes Ouch is the Only Way to describe it

A Laura nasceu!!!!

My sister-in-law is Brazilian so this was her Facebook post this morning after the arrival of our brand new niece, Laura Maria. I truly am excited to meet her, and so very happy for my husband’s baby brother and his wife.

And, ouch.

I am not even sure where this “ouch” is coming from. I didn’t experience any feelings of sadness with the arrival of Brigid Rose last week. Why am I feeling this now?

I cannot put words to it, and actually think it is better not to try. I simply see that it is there and let it be.

Sadness is an inevitable emotion. For women consciously conceiving it can sneak up on us out of the blue. When it does, it smacks us in the face like a bitter wind gust in the middle of winter.

The key is to not allow this sadness to turn us to bitter cold.

There will be times when our hearts hurt, realizing that this incredible miracle has evaded us. Yet, it is important to remember in those times that the evasion is illusionary. Our time will come.

Pretending the emotion is not there however, or grabbing ahold of it for dear life, only strengthens its grip on us.

So today I see the sadness, I have compassion for that part of me that is feeling a bit raw, and then I let it pass and move on.

Today is a happy day and it will be for me as well. Just so long as I make room for all of my emotions, acknowledge each of them, and then turn back to the joy.

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