Infertility & the slow “s” death: How to stop shoulding yourself

I should be doing this, I should be doing that, I should have asked this question, I should have taken that supplement, I should have been stronger, I should not have cried, I should not have had that glass of wine, I should just go along with it even though everything in me is screaming no, I should, I should, I should . . .

I believe that the word “should” must have in another life been a four-letter word. The word is nastier than the “f-bomb,” more shocking than the word “sh*t” falling out of a four-year-old’s mouth. Should is one word that needs to be banned on the TV and radio, and removed from Webster’s Dictionary.

You see “should” is an insidious thing, it sneaks into our minds when we don’t even realize it is there. And then the next thing we know we are running the tape on auto and smacking ourselves silly with all of the things that we should and should not be doing, the things we should or should have done, and the things we should or should not do in the future.

So today perhaps consider boycotting the word “should.” Stick it up on the shelf and let it get all dusty and crusty.

Each day we do the best that we can. We try our hardest, and sometimes we don’t succeed. Sometimes we let people down. Sometimes we let ourselves down, Yet the only way we can recover is to get up and try again tomorrow.

So stop shoulding yourself into the shame graveyard. Stop dying a slow death by internal self-loathing. Bury that awful word way deep down and change your internal audio to the muzak channel and hum along on the elevator ride to the top.


  1. Great post.

    1. Thanks Annie 🙂

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