Infertility & living life in the meantime: Be doubled over with compassion

One gift infertility bestows upon us is the gift of time, which truthfully can feel a bit more like a curse than a gift. It is however a gift no less–should we choose to take advantage of it.

When we are in the process of becoming mothers, whether by body or heart, we have time. We have time to heal our bodies, we have time to heal our relationships, we have time to achieve things we were placed on the earth to achieve before we conquer motherhood, and we have time to be doubled over with compassion.

Some days we need to forget about the trappings of daily life–what to eat, where to go, and what to do–and move on to find a greater purpose for this passing of time.

A dear friend shared the below poem with me, and today I share it with you. May today we all find ourselves doubled over in compassion. More focused on helping the world, the people we love, our friends, neighbors, and strangers than we are on our own burdens.

Time is passing and when it has gone, when we hold our beautiful children on our laps and in our hearts, they will take up all of the room once open there. And when we look back on this time, in the years when we seek to shape the character of those very children, may we have the stories to tell them about how once, we were the light. Once we were the light in the bulb which illuminated the world.

Seeing, in Three Pieces

Somehow we must see 
through the shimmering cloth
 of daily life, its painted,
 evasive facings of what to eat, 
to wear? Which work
 matters? Is a bird more or less than a man?


There have been people
 who helped the world. Named 
or not named. They weren’t interested 
in what might matter,
 doubled over as they were 
with compassion. Laden
branches, bright rivers.


When a bulb burns out
 we just change it–
it’s not the bulb we love;
 it’s the light.

 ~ Kate Knapp ~

(Wind Somewhere and Shade)

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