Don’t go into the light: How to deal with the baby websites of friends when you may never have one of your own

 Today I would like to give each and every one of us permission to not go into the light.

To not click on that tiny, seemingly harmless, link that floats through cyberspace and into our email inboxes. You know the one, the link that carries with it proclamations of an excited mom-to-be, and every little detail, and sonogram, of our dear friend’s baby belly.

Yes, in a moment of brief insanity we may believe that we can handle all that we will see and read on the baby-to-be’s website. I mean after all we are happy for our friend, we would never want her to know our pain, and we want to be a “good friend” in supporting her with this exciting transition in her life. Yet that moment is brief insanity.

Stop, whatever you do, do not go into the light. Do not click on that link.

It is ok to love our friends, and to love ourselves at the same time. We are human, and therefore we are limited in our ability to please all of the people all of the time. And so, we must take care of our tender hearts rather than bleeding them dry in an effort to be there for everyone else.

There are many ways to support, many ways to love, and many ways to celebrate a friend’s pregnancy and impending child. Just make sure that the ways you choose also honor and care for your healing heart.

So today, you have my blessing, permission, and encouragement to not go into the light, and in doing so to feel no single shred of guilt.

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