I doubt that many people who know me well would describe me as meek.
I am not one who shuffles my feet, nor who hangs my head.
If asked for an opinion, I usually have one, and I’m not usually afraid to express it.
So why is it that when my job catapulted to the next level, and the adoption paperwork became intrusive, I regressed backward? When did my ROAR turn into a meow?
I suppose this experience is not unique to me, and in fact not unique to women who have failed to conceive the “good ole fashioned way.” Perhaps there are moments that all women, or more correctly all humans, find their self-confidence in a tattered life raft barely afloat on a raging sea.
There are moments when we all doubt ourselves, moments when we question our ability, moments when we feel as though we’ll soon be discovered for the fraud that truthfully, we aren’t.
So how do we find our ROAR again? How do we regain the self-assuredness of our youth when the world was wide open in front of us and we just knew we could conquer it all?
One day at a time.
One day we remind ourselves of the flagstones of successes we have left on the path behind us.
Another day we remind ourselves that it takes more strength, so much more strength, to fight for motherhood that is earned, not given.
And yet another day we tell that nagging voice inside our head that all of its stories are wrong, and in fact we are pretty damn amazing human beings.
Then, in the midst of a meow, we break into a ROAR because only the strong survive, and we are surviving.