We are still waiting to hear back on the recent opportunity to have our profile shown, however during the wait I’ve been thinking a lot about the similarities between infertility and adoption. Perhaps more precisely, the extension of infertility into adoption.
Instead of a negative HPT, it’s a “your profile was not selected.” Instead of questioning which reproductive imperfection has robbed you of the opportunity to become a mother, it’s questioning what aspect of your profile left you deemed unsuitable. Instead of sperm not meeting egg, it’s profile not meeting match.
And I’ve been thinking a lot about something Anthony Robles, NCAA wrestling champion who was born, and wrestled, with one leg, said recently when he spoke at a meeting I attended “you were made that way for a reason, you just need to figure out what it is.” These words of advice came to him from his mother when he was a child struggling to understand why he was born with one leg, and how that fact limited his life.
I think that Anthony’s mom was onto something. Each and every one of us was made the way we are for a reason, and perhaps this life is about figuring out what that reason is. Anthony found his reason, his whole life transforming when his perseverance, dedication, and refusal to give up, landed him an NCAA wrestling championship that opened doors to his career as a motivational speaker, his personal passion.
So today I am asking myself, and I am asking you, what’s your reason? I don’t know the answer yet, however not unlike Anthony, I won’t give up until I find it. I hope that you won’t either.
Because every day, in every struggle, we are being molded for a purpose; we are growing into shoes that are awaiting our filling. And getting to that purpose, and those shoes, takes a strong will, a commitment like no other, and a deep knowing that the reason for our making is out there.
And like Anthony also said “when opportunity doesn’t knock, build your own door.”
So while I haven’t been matched with my child yet, I have called a local hospital to sign up as a “Cuddle” volunteer in the fall. A volunteer who holds, rocks, and feeds babies in the NICU.
I may not have my door, but I’ll be damned if I can’t fit myself through this window.